Tuesday, March 11, 2008


beauty all over..

so my wife just came back from the bahamas and she had a great time with her family.. it sucked not being able to go but i had a good time home too.. when i went to pick her up at the airport, it was one of the greatest feeling to see her walking toward outside baggage claim.. its as if something wonderful walks back into your life and you remember how much she means to you..

on sunday we were driving back from church and we had a great time just driving, talking, listening.. she was disgusted with all of the bug bites she had over her body, bummed about the sunburn she received.. now i have to say this because it is the honest truth and i feel obligated to share.. the thought of, the smell of, the feeling of, the sight of, the taste of, the love of my wife turns me on.. this isnt just limited to my body, but my whole being.. there is something about being married to her and going through everyday life that increase my love for her, devotion, appreciation for what we have.. as we go through life my heart, mind, body, and soul are constantly stirred and challenged, leaving me deeply in love with her..

back to the short story.. on sunday, the day was right.. the sun was out.. the sky was blue.. the heat hugged your skin.. the wind blew early spring goodness.. we are driving and shannon is bummed about bug bites and sunburns.. as she talks about this, i replied by saying that "imperfection is just a misunderstanding".. whether i was trying to drop a line on her or be smooth, this struck a chord with me..

i was reminded that no matter how we feel about ourselves, true love always looks beyond our faults, blemishes, bug bites, sunburns, shortcomings, failures.. when we feel imperfect, we misunderstand the truth that we are loved no matter what we think is wrong with us.. there is nothing about my wife that can change my mind that she is completely, perfectly made..

the way we feel about ourselves also tends to reflect the way we feel about the world or about others.. sometimes i find that the things that i dont like or annoy me about some people are things that i dont like about myself.. i guess the issue is, we all need to learn how to love ourselves.. i think that most of the time, i tend to put all my energy towards loving others that i forget or choose not to love myself.. i come from a very insecure past and only learned to love myself at the age of 18.. it started with putting an end to self-hatred..

well, i have to go now and i feel that i have so much to say but so little time.. i hope this wasnt too confusing.. i know that i grew up in church learning to love others.. i wish someone could have taken time to teach me to love myself too.. live n learn i guess..

disclaimer: some may think that some of this may be too much to share but i dare not see the day that i could no longer say these things about her.. part of this and many of my other blogs are on here for my own personal record.. there are blogs that i do not want to forget.. this is one of them.. plus, a man should never be afraid to share his feeling about his wife.. sometime wives need to hear them.. sometimes men need to hear their own feelings too..

Friday, March 07, 2008


highway 1 - santa cruz, ca

this week my home has been wifeless cause shannon has been out of town.. my good friend david branch happen to have his spring break this week so he decided to come out for a visit.. today we went to san francisco to see the sites.. the day consisted of fisherman's wharf / pier 39 / the bush man / clam chowder bread bowl / golden gate bridge / haight - ashbury / and lumbard street.. on our way back to santa cruz, we decided to take highway 1, a 60 mile drive back home.. it was a beautiful drive.. we stopped at the pigeon point lighthouse to catch the sunset pictured above.. it was my first time taking highway 1 from san fran to santa cruz.. definitely will be doin that again.. i highly recommend it..

ps.. as david and i were walking towards pier 39, when we passed her, some random old lady started yelling, "i hate hawaiians.. go back to hawaii.. go back to hawaii".. she then started to try to tell me to go back to samoa, only it sounded like a mix between samoa and somalia.. i didnt really know what to say.. i wasnt sure if i was more offended by her hatred of polynesians or that she didnt know i was tongan.. oh well, i figured we all have our story and shame on the hawaiian man that broke her heart in the past.. well i dont know if thats why shes so mad.. just run with it..

on our way back, we saw her from a distance and i decided to walk right past her with a blank stare.. she didnt say a word.. my first thought was "man she could of gave me a great blog to write".. i guess i'll just have to settle for the sunset..

pss.. this blog took me 4.5 hours to write cause me firefighter pager has been goin off all night.. only medical calls though.. its 4:36 am.. im tired.. nite..